Dear Reader: The Unauthorized Autobiography of Kim Jong Il

This book hit my library a few months ago after I started following Blair White’s podcast. I knew who Michael Malice was of course, being the famous twitter troll that he is, but on Blair’s podcast, she asked him what book he wrote that was either his favorite or he was most proud of, something like that he said it was Dear Reader: The Unauthorized Autobiography of Kim Jong Il, which makes it this week’s book of the week. As dictated to Michael Malice.  

Kim Jong Il was born on February 16, 1942, at the base of Mt Paektu, Korea. He remembers it perfectly. Because of course he does. He was also talking and walking well ahead of the bell curve. His father was, of course, the great leader Kim Il Sung, and his mother was anti-Japanese war heroine Kim Jong Suk. Note: whenever his mother is mentioned in this book, it is ALWAYS as anti-Japanese war heroine Kim Jong Suk. The weather patterns were completely unique on the day he was born. While it snowed, as one might expect in February, the snowflakes danced, and the morning sun shone through.  

 Not too long after he was born, Korea won the war against Japan. Just Korea. America had no part in ending that war. Although America is definitely the only country to ever use atomic weapons, there is never any mention as to who they used these weapons against.  

So, Korea won the war against Japan thanks to the brilliant leadership of Kim Il Sung. And Kim Jong Il set out to become the most perfect son Korea had ever known, one who would not only embrace the idea of Juche but become the absolute embodiment of the concept.   

So, what is Juche? To understand the land that would become North Korea, aka the Democratic People’s Republic of Korea (DPKR), one needs to understand Juche.  

Juche is the belief that a country will prosper once it achieves self-reliance in the realms of political, economic, and military independence. All through socialism. Of course. Because capitalism would never encourage self-reliance. 

 And this book regales us with the tale of young Kim Jong Il’s coming of age, his school days, how he grew up in the communist party of the DPRK and the contributions he made to encourage its greatness and growth.  

And it’s told straight. No tongue in cheek, no sense that this is in anyway a joke. This is very much Kim Jong Il’s story, as it is told in the Democratic People’s Republic of Korea.   

So, once he was born at the base of Mt Paektu, and after his younger sister was born, his mother, anti-Japanese Heroine Kim Jong Suk died. No mention what she died of, just that she died, and Kim Jong Il told his sister, Kim Kyong-Hui, that he would be her mother. This is literally the only mention of any of his siblings until the last chapter of the book, when he again mentions Kim Kyong-hui. Around the time of Kim Il Sung’s death is when it occurred to me to google whether or not there were other Kim children. There were four other Kim children, one full brother who died quite young, and three half siblings with Kim Jong Il’s stepmother. Assuming she married the Great Leader. I have no idea.  

So, Kim Jong Il was an absolute paragon. Seriously. In addition to talking at 3 months and walking at 6...and remembering his entire life from birth to death with perfect clarity, Kim Jong Il was the most brilliant child the schools in Korea had ever seen, always raising questions the teachers couldn’t answer and having them find the answers to keep up with his clever mind. It was in grade school that he introduced the idea of corrections: having your classmates tell you what was wrong with you. For your own good of course. And Kim Jong Il provides examples of how he helped his classmates to realize Juche was best, including charming anecdotes about improving vandalism, but not against public buildings. But of course, all buildings in Korea are public buildings.  

As part of his coming-of-age story, Kim Jong Il had to navigate, and assist the country and the Great Leader in navigating, the triple threats of flunkeyism, dogmatism, and factionalism. 

 So, flunkeyism was “the tendency of a developing country to worship more powerful countries. In Korea, that might mean worshiping Russia or China as more powerful and wanting to follow in their footsteps.’ No disrespect to China or Russia, but Korea could do better with less. And did. The corrections Kim Jong Il recommended quickly became national policy. Because how can you improve if your friends don’t tell you you’re wrong? 

 Dogmatism is “an inflexible way of thinking where one imitates others blindly without considering concrete conditions and situations” 

 In the chapter on Dogmatism, he talks about how he recommended every Korean should read 10,000 pages a year, to his college professors. Who were awestruck by this idea and seemed to think that was an audacious and bold plan. That’s less than 30 pages a day. I am...unimpressed.

Although, to be fair, that probably is more reading than the average American does. On the other hand, if you are only allowed to read state sponsored educational material, are you really broadening your horizons or learning anything new?  

Factionalism is “preaching the wrong ideas for their own sake. They were opposed to the Prime Minister on principle, the principle of opposition simply for the sake of opposition.” Disagreeing with the Great Leader is wrong. This chapter is where we learn that humanity originated in Korea over 1 million years ago, as proven definitively when the archaeologists in DPRK found the proof by digging where Kim Jong Il told them to dig, based on Juche principles. Self-reliance will also teach you historical truth. I guess.  

He talks about such historically significant incidents as the USS Pueblo, the poplar tree incident, the 1988 Seoul Olympics and the bombing of S Korean flight Korean Air Flight 858 on November 29, 1987. Understand, all of these incidents 100 % occurred. But what they are taught in North Korea, is very different from what we are taught. We are taught that the USS Pueblo was an environmental survey ship that was held hostage by North Korea for about three months. North Korea is taught that this was a US Spy ship they captured engaged in espionage in Korean waters. I will grant that I am probably biased in my belief that this was just an environmental survey ship, and no spying was done. I’m basing that off my knowledge of US history, and the absolute loathing Kim Jong Il had for American’s. Also, allegedly, the 80 or so captured sailors requested to engage in gay sex because that was the American way. Now.... the Pueblo incident occurred in 1968. In 1968, gay sex was still illegal in the United States. They might...MAYBE...have had a single gay sailor. If they did, that guy was deep in the closet and would not have advertised the fact at risk of losing his job or possibly being jailed in America. So, I find it extremely unlikely the entire crew was gay. Despite what the Village People advertised.  

The Poplar Tree incident was a bit sadder. This occurred in 1976 when two US military personnel entered the Joint Security Area of the DMZ to cut down a... poplar tree. The North Koreans...as reported by Kim Jong Il....there were 40 Americans to 4 Koreans, but because the Koreans know Tae Kwon Do, they were easily able to disarm the 40 Americans and cut down two of them with their axes. Seriously, two US servicemen died, Captain Arthur Bonifas and First Lieutenant Mark Barrett. This, according to Kim Jong Il, is the only time he ever disappointed his father, the great leader Kim Il Sung. But he managed to work his way back into his father’s good graces and was named successor.  

The one incident where I completely lost it and started laughing so hard I cried was the recounting of the Korean Air Flight 858 terrorist bombing, which has been definitively linked to North Korea, specifically due to the confession of captured bomber Kim Hyon-hui who reported everything to South Korea following her capture, including her training and that she and her partner, who managed to successfully kill themselves via cyanide capsule post capture, were impersonating Japanese travelers. Hyon-hui was eventually pardoned based on her being brain washed. More on that in just a minute.  

What made me laugh so hard was after Kim Jong Il’s very sarcastic retelling of Hyon-hui's training and mission, he reports “I can offer absolute proof that the American story behind Korean Air Flight 858 isn’t true. The proof is as follows: I would never have to send a Korean abroad to impersonate a Japanese person, since I’d been kidnapping and training actual Japanese women for that purpose for many years.” That bold announcement was a surprising laugh out loud moment in the book.  

So, he retells many such anecdotes, but about thirty pages in, I realized that I am reading the autobiography of a cult leader. What makes me so sure? Remember two weeks ago when I read Cults Inside & Out by Rick Alan Ross?  

So, we are looking at a cult situation, with a following of millions. Jim Jones would be so envious. Which also explains why Hyon-hui was pardoned. She was undoubtedly brainwashed. Now, not to be mistaken, there are definite missteps in the west as well. South Korea screwed up when, in 1989, North Korea held a youth athletic conference, and the one competitor from South Korea who competed was arrested and jailed for five years immediately on returning from North Korea. She had violated South Korean law by traveling to North Korea, and was jailed for it. Which certainly seems unjust given that a bomber responsible for 115 deaths was allowed to go free.  

Throughout the book, American’s are painted as the great evil enemy in DPRK. So, we got that going for us. The very last chapter he talks about his three sons. His eldest, Kim Jong Nam, was bypassed for inheriting based on his western sympathies. His second son, Kim Jong Chol, was bypassed for being too effeminate. And so, his third son, Kim Jong Un, inherited supreme leadership of the Democratic People’s Republic of Korea. No mention of what Kim Jong Il’s three daughters inherited.   

But it was the last like four pages of the book that really drives home this book. Like, intellectually, I was aware that dear leader (as Kim Jong Il was called in North Korea) was a bit of a power-hungry mad man, and that what the North Korean’s are taught is significantly different from what the rest of the world is taught. But the last four pages, stenographer Michael Malice’s brilliance in story telling is driven home brutally. In the last four pages, Kim Jong Il reports on what exactly happens in the reeducation camps in North Korea, why it doesn’t matter, and how he can prove it...by listing a long litany of American power players who cared about such atrocities occurring everywhere...anywhere else...but in North Korea. 

It was such a brutal slap in the face that my husband came down to help feed our menagerie right when I finished reading and he saw me crying and, being a good husband, asked if I was ok. And I said point blank, this book was brilliant, with the last four pages being a brutal slap in the face of any American who pretends to care about civil rights. As the saying goes.... 

 We truly know nothing. The information is out there. And no one does anything to help. But as Kim Jong Il himself points out in the book, revolution starts within. And DPRK citizens are taught not to rebel. Or their families will suffer for their insolence. 

This book was amazing. I read and reviewed this book for YouTube on November 20, 2022, but it’s now available on Rumble and PodBean.